The Paradox of Adventure

I’m realizing how close to an end my time in China is and how I can’t even keep up with my own adventures. It’s hard to know what to write about, what to share, and what to keep as sacred moments in my heart. China has been a roller coaster. Some days I count on my calendar how many days I have left and look at all my plans for coming home with excitement. On those particular days I have felt more than ready to move on and embark on my next phase of life. Other days I have been hit by a wave of emotion realizing that I will most likely never see these kids I teach again, and that as much as I miss home, I will be leaving another home behind as well. 

I’ve been thinking about what happens on a daily basis in China and have come to a conclusion that my thoughts on my adventures are a sort of a paradox. On an average day, my friends here and I will set off to look for a new adventure. Sometimes they are more planned then others but often they are pretty spontaneous. They are never what we expect but always exciting. Just last week we were looking for a park that apparently didn’t exist and instead found a ginormous international hotel where we waltzed into like we owned the place. We tried to stop at every floor, snuck into the golden emperor club suite, climbed out a window, almost got kicked out, and then found a different park we think was owned by the hotel. We found a cave-like path that led to a beautiful view. At the top of the view point was a small table where sat down and started playing cards.  Soon enough we attracted two new friends with broken English who we taught an American card game to. Things like this are really not out of the ordinary for us while in China, but yet they are pretty out of the ordinary. 

I am caught between a feeling of thinking that adventure is not that uncommon if we just go out and do something and let the wind lead you, and thinking that maybe adventure really isn’t that common and I’ve just started to view my life in China as the norm. I don’t know if those thoughts even make sense on paper but I think what I want to get at is two different lessons I’ve learned. One, that we should never let a place or a life style become boring to us. China is beautiful and my life is beautiful, but living somewhere for a certain amount of time, it is easy to just get used to the way things are. I want to be able to appreciate daily and take in the life around me, and how beautiful it is, and what a privilege it is to be living where I am living. Along with that, the second thing I’ve learned is that, if things do start to get boring or your life starts feeling average, seek out something new! I think no matter where you are at or what you are doing, there is room to explore. I think adventure is everywhere. So, no, I don’t think you need to go live in a foreign country to have a life full of meaningful adventure, but this experience has definitely made we want to travel more and see the world simply because adventure is everywhere and I want to look for it all around the world.  

I also think that traveling is a special way to gain more light as well as spread light far and wide. China truly has been a life changing experience for me. I have decided on a new major, committed to new life goals, and gained spiritual insights that have impacted my beliefs and faith deeply. Being in this land has not only inspired me and lead me to a deeper light, but allowed me to enhance myself in a way that now I have a light to share with the people in China and others that are a part of my life. 

My decision to come to china was not like a big revelatory thing I felt I needed to do. It is something I wanted to do so I did it. As I prayed about coming here I knew that God trusted me and would guide me as I went forward. I have a testimony that God has a lot of trust in us and wants us to make our own decisions. As we make them with righteous desires and good intentions, he supports us and helps us along the way. China was my idea but God has not left my side while I have been here. I think sometimes we get caught up on making decisions because we don’t know if it’s “right”. If we just choose a path, things tend to work themselves out. This is not to say there won’t be bumps and detours along the way but I believe they do work out in the end. As we do venture on to a path we will see opportunities pop up in ways we never would have expected. I have come to learn that whatever opportunities come, and whatever we feel is our calling and path in life, God wants us to do whatever will reach the most people. His purpose is for all of his children to return home to him. If we can choose a path that we are passionate about and enjoy, or passion can help lift, encourage, and inspire others to also live a fulfilling life. Living a life like that, with purpose and meaning, is what leads us to a loving god who wants us to succeed and have a fullness of joy.

What are you passionate about? What do you want to do in life? Do it. If you want to go to a foreign country, make it happen. Just start and make your own choices, I know that as we do, God is proud of us and will help us and will provide us with life altering blessings that will light your world and those around you. When we are doing what we love we have more love in our heart and everyone is effected for the better. 

Yuelu Moutain.
My favorite hike in Changsha! I just did it for the third time with my parents! Stay tuned for my next blog post about their visit here!

Gavin is a ladies man.
Rachel is a sweetheart.
Owen is a character.
Dora is a sassy queen.
Lexi is a dancing princess.
Regan is a sweet, wild, monster.

I don't know how this ends up being a daily occurance. 

"Capture the coconut", was the goal here. 

Where ever we go, if the shop keepers have kids, they always push them to practice their English and come talk to us. This girl does latin dance and showed her skills to me. 

An outdoor club we met on our hike. 

Squad. and me sticking out my belly as far as I possibly can for no apparent reason. Who knows, guys. 

So I've been taking Tae Kwon Do lessons.. I'm basically a really strong pretzel now. 

Me sneaking out the window at the top of an international hotel. See above for details. Yeah, I know you people that just look at the pics. 

Cards at the non-existant, beautiful park.

Secret view of the city. 

Laying or standing?

Our coordinator Tina is the BEST! She just had her baby boy!! These last two weeks will be rough without her at the school. At least will have her sweet son Ryan. 

Our AMAZING friend, Allen. We met him on our hike and just a few days later he planned an all day excursion for us at his University. Literal best human alive. We love Allen.

Our Senior babies! They will be graduating from the program this month. 

Calligraphy. Such an art. 

Everyone come to China. 

"May Your Heart be Turned to Prayer"

Today I wish to bare simple testimony that God answers prayers. Even when your prayers are nothing but you rolling out of bed exhausted each morning and with a slight negative attitude pleading for charity and to just feel happy for that day, prayer works. This week was really nothing out of the ordinary but it was a fantastic week.

A couple weeks ago a wave of anxiety hit and I didn’t want to do anything but be by myself in my room. I didn’t want to go anywhere or talk to anyone.  For any of you that really know me, you know that is not normal for me. I am an extravert and I get my energy from other people. So shutting people out for a full 7 days did not help pull me out of my weird funk.

At the end of my bad week, we got invited by the school to go to a party for all the teachers at our school. By this point I was sick of feeling the way I was feeling and knew I needed to force myself to interact with people. Turns out this party was exactly my scene. After being slaughtered in a game of ping-pong by the janitor at our school who was, might I add, wearing 5 inch hills, we played games, ate snacks, and had a huge karaoke/ dance party! There is nothing like a good dance party where I can dance and sing at the top of my lungs to make your girl happy. I sang and danced all afternoon and had a wave of energy that made up for the whole previous week.

I was so happy to be feeling like myself again and realized I needed to keep my vibrant attitude for the whole next week. Thus began my simple prayers of “please help me to feel happy today.” As simple as this week was, I have never felt more closely bonded to the girls in my group, and each day was a brand new adventure that filled my soul with joy. In church today we sang the song “Secret Prayer”. In the last line of the chorus this song says that prayer can “unite our soul with heaven.” I have been united.

                                                                    <3 <3 <3

For anyone interested in the specifics of my daily adventures, here is a synopsis of our last 7 days in CHANGSHA, CHINA.

Sunday, May 13

I will never get over how kind the people are here. On this day, one of the parents invited all of us to go see the tea fields and have an afternoon out relaxing. Six of the parents of our students all drove us in their fancy cars, and gave us the royal treatment. I’ve noticed that when someone is trying to connect with you and show you how happy they are to be meeting you, but there is a language barrier, they just bombard you with food. Yes, please. I didn’t stop eating the whole day! And the tea fields were so green and beautiful. They really believe in their tea here. One of the girls in our group was joking the other day that you could probably show up to a doctor with a hole in your arm and they would send you away with some sort of magic tea.

Monday, May 14

Me and two girls in my group headed to this amazing 26 story mall we love but incidentally ended up actually entering the twilight zone instead. We very innocently tried to go to floor 10 where there was a supposed spa. We got on the elevator where every button is present EXCEPT floor 10! We press button 9 hoping to find some stairs that lead to 10. After going up and down stairs every direction around floor 9, we finally find double doors in a hollow corridor. We walk through to see a long hall way that looks like it connects in a big square. Its dark, and abandoned, insanely creepy, and somehow just open to the public. As we start walking down the hallway, (why did we choose to walk down the hallway?) we see a bunch of rooms filled with dirt and some random potted plants, filling approximately 10 or more rooms. It gets weirder. Another room was lit up with dark blue lighting. When we entered a room with creep-o orange hanging light fixtures and a stroller and broken glass, I was ready to dip. Problem was, we were too deep in and didn’t really know how to get out. Also, where was the spa?! I definitely spotted some drug perihelia and no sign of a relaxing, happy bath for miles. We open up a door with the handle broken which lead to a large restaurant-like kitchen, but there was not restaurant. To add to the eeriness, none of the chefs, who were strangely dressed like they were from the 1800’s, seemed phased when 3 American girls busted through a broken door from a dark abyss. We got on the elevator but the buttons didn’t work. we somehow got taken to a parking garage, got on a different elevator, pressed floor 8, but then 8 looked just like floor 10. WHAT? We thought we finally found the normal part of the mall, but there was a sign with shattered glass and blinking lights so we didn’t head towards it. In the end I don’t even know how we found our way out, but it was terrifying, people! Okay, so maybe this wasn’t the happiest of the days, but looking back in was and adventure, and a little bit funny. We found a cute book store by the end of our time at the mall so it was fine. When in China.

Tuesday, May 15 & Wednesday, May 16

Both of these days were very relaxed but filled with fun moments I shared with my group. We had lots of laughs and I made time for myself as well. I was very productive, made time to work out, and got to face time some friends from home and my sister. It was these two days where I received the friendly reminder that it is our loved ones, and sharing love with them that is the key to happiness. I love people!

Thursday, May 17

I went on a run and had an epiphany. Back story: we can only use so much energy in our apartment and if we go over we have to pay for it. So basically it is 95 degrees and 100% humidity here, we live on the top of a 3 story apartment, and we can only have the air on in our rooms for 3 hours a day. Summary: every night we literally melt in our sleep. SO, I proposed the idea to keep the air off in each of our 3 rooms all day long and then sleep in one room so we can add our hours together and leave our AC on all night long. This would also mean actually being able to sleep all night long and not wake up in a pool of our own sweat. So the next three days we had a sleepover. To distract ourselves from the heat on Thursday, our day was composed of sitting in a circle eating frozen bread, making our own ping-pong table, making disgusting powder based Hawaiian punch to play “Hawaiian Punch Pong”, and making even more disgusting popsicles out of highly concentrated crystal lite. But the memories made and a full night of air conditioned bliss was so worth it.

Friday, May 18

We went and saw “A Quiet Place” In theaters! SO GOOD. This was a big step for me because I DON’T do scary movies. Really guys, I get scared watching Disney channel Halloween movies if its night and I’m by myself. But this movie was beautiful! It was cool to see in China since its almost all silent and the parts with subtitles for the ASL I couldn’t read because it was in Chinese, but I do know ASL so it was so special to watch. 10/10. Afterwards we found a beauty store and I spent all my food money for the weekend there... so there’s that. Disclaimer: I bought two pairs of sunglasses, lipstick, eyeshadow, 4 facemasks, perfume, and two bottles of nail polish for $20 so. China is a great place. We had a fun girl’s night putting on make-up on each other in our cold room and watching “Mama-Mia”.

Saturday, May 19

Our Chinese coordinator thinks we are ridiculous for being so conservative and not wanting to go over our energy per month on our AC, so she invited us over to her house for the day to sit in AC all day long! She is the best! We love Tina. We taught her and one of the other Chinese teachers how to play American card games, (bad plan because they actually whooped us), and raided Tina of all her candy and ice cream. I don’t know how much more American we can get. The principal and Vice principal from our school was also there and they made us a delicious meal. We don’t deserve these people!

Until next week, I love you all, and you know what’s coming next, GO FIND AN ADVENTURE!

Oh, the Places I've Been

The last two weeks, and really the last 2.5 months have been life changing. Today makes day 5 of trying to sit down and write this post because I really don’t know where to start. As I have been in China my eyes have been opened to self-discovery, philosophical view points, and new dreams I didn’t know I had. It’s hard to put it all into words.

I almost just want to say, “the blog ends here, pack your bag and go on an adventure. Stop reading and become a student of the world and make new discoveries.” But I do think sharing our experiences and beautifully obtained moments is almost as important as acquiring them ourselves, so I will try my best to convey some of mine.

Friday, April 27th, my group and I embarked on our big 9-day vacation that we get during our stay here as volunteer teachers. We started our excursion by taking a 13-hour sleeper train (i.e. transportable, Closter phobic, 3 person bunkbeds from hell) to Pt. I of our trip: BEIJING. Beijing had more for me in store than I can wrap my head around. It made the hellish ride 100% worth it.

After arriving Saturday morning, we spent a nice afternoon at the Summer Palace and then made a new friend who we had dinner with. We settled in at our hostel to prepare for our Sunday. We had planned to attend the LDS branch there and then go to the Forbidden City. I’ve shared some of my church experience here so many of you know my typically church routine is all through technology. I call in on a landline and listen. The only branches we can attend here are international because the laws here prohibit foreigners from worshiping with the nationals. In some largely populated cities in China they have international branches that meet in person; Beijing is one of those cities. Being able to attend was important to me because it meant getting to partake of the sacrament. However, we learned Saturday night that if there was any chance of getting into the Forbidden City, we would have to get there 1st thing in the morning which would mean missing church. All of us were torn but eventually decided collectively that we would go to the Forbidden City. We are in China after all. I woke up the next morning with the just a slight impression in my heart that I should go to church. I almost didn’t say anything because if I wanted to go I would need two others from our group to come as well. Moments before we were about to head out I casually mentioned my plan and was pleased to find 2 other girls in my group were having the same desire to attend the branch. So off we went. To church in China.

For the remainder of the day I found myself repeating over and over the phrase “I cannot BELIEVE I almost didn’t go.” YOU GUYS. I ran into one of my best friend’s fiancé, the niece of a lady from my teeny tiny hometown, a guy who is good friends with my childhood best friend, and the cousin of a lady from my mission who is one of the most influential ladies in my life! Um, Hi. Did I mention I’m in CHINA?! 4 connections from the states while I’m IN CHINA. My heart was exploding! Not to mention, the talks that were given were exactly what I needed to hear, AND I met two different women who are basically on the path that I am working to get on. Here in China, I have decided that I will be changing my major. I still have the same ultimate career goals, but my path there has shifted. I was able to talk to these two women I met about my ideas and my goals, which synced up very closely with theirs. It was like God was personally telling me, “Yes, you are making the right choices, carry on with confidence.” I’m still bamboozled. AND 4 out of 6 of these people don’t even regularly attend this branch! We all just happened to be there, for one Sunday only, all on this particular Sunday.

I was elated in receiving yet another witness that God knows ME. Me and the two other girls in my group enjoyed the rest of our afternoon in the gardens next to the Forbidden City. We marveled at the wonder of being God’s children living on this incredible earth he has created for each of us individually.

That was just the start of my week and a half excursion. Read ahead for more of the OOOH’s and AWWW’s of this life I’m so blessed to live.

THE GREAT WALL. I’ll be honest, the name doesn’t do it justice. I’ll be more honest; I don’t know how to adequately describe just how great it is. REMEDY: GO THERE! We were able to explore the side of the wall that hasn’t been redone. We are talking B.C. years here, people. Some of the steps were so crumbled that they could hardly be identified as steps. it was really sketchy. Because this is not the touristy part of the wall, it is not really photographed. My mind did not give me the picture I was expecting. Its more, just... uasldjfilsdjf… ugh. GO THERE. Anyway. I’m looking at this wall, and I’m going back to my thought I shared previously on my blog about how God’s creations are what give me the most joy. It’s nature and people that fills my soul to the brim. But then I’m looking at the wall and I just think, people MADE this! This 13,000 mile (and counting), incredibly ancient wall in the mountains was made by human hands. I realized we truly are meant to CREATE! President Dieter F. Uchtdorf said: “You might say, I am not the creative type. If that is how you feel, think again and remember that you are spirit daughters [and sons] of the most creative being in the Universe”. God made us and he made this earth so that we could build upon it and develop ourselves and each other. In the words of Dr. Seuss. “You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose”. We all have unlimited potential to become GREAT if we set our sights high, seek adventure, and aspire to do what may seem right now, in our little, but oh so powerful minds, impossible. Walt Disney once said, “It’s kind of fun to do the impossible”.

After backpacking for 3 hours, eating, watching the sunset, and setting up a tent on the Great Wall of China, I lied inside my tent and thought, I want my life to be Great. My mind suddenly flooded with things I want to do. I want to start a vlog, I want to travel to Norway, and Romania, and Korea, Morocco and everyplace far and in between. I want to be an influence for good. I want to be spontaneous and go on weekend trips even when I’m swamped with the responsibilities life brings. I want to write a book. I want to change the world. Granted, I wanted to do most of these things before camping on the Great Wall of China, but it was in this moment that it really just clicked that I actually can. I’ve always been an advocate for following your dreams and making them happen, but it just hit me that dreams never have to end or expire. We shouldn’t limit our dreams. We should fill our lives as full as we can with greatness. I don’t want to waste any time. I want to take every moment I have and live in it! With all my heart, might, mind and soul.

I think this epiphany that I had in contrast with coming home and getting back in to a routine of teaching screaming children who don’t actually speak the same language as you, is what made this post so incredibly hard to write. I was so inspired under the tower on a tiny section of such an insurmountable wall. I had great gumption and real intent to take my life by the reigns and live the best life I could every single day. Yet here I am in my small apartment in China on a Friday night, doing nothing but stumbling over words for a blog and wishing I was home so I could move on to the next thing in my life. Life is HARD.

I believed Dr. Seuss when he said,

“You’ll be on your way up! 

You’ll be seeing great sights! 

You’ll join the high fliers 

Who soar to high heights.

“You won’t lag behind, because you’ll have the speed. 

You’ll pass the whole gang and you’ll soon take the lead. 

Wherever you fly, you’ll be best of the best.

Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.”

But he also hit it on the head as he continues and says:

“I’m sorry to say so 

but, sadly, it’s true

that Bang-ups

and Hang-ups

can happen to you.” 

But Oh the Places I’ve already been.

After Beijing I headed to the most beautiful place I’ve ever been, Yangshuo. Home of the renowned Dr. Seuss mountains and endless adventures. I river rafted through the whimsical shaped mountains. I “river drifted” (friendly term for a level 4 white water rapid with handles to hold on to instead ores to steer). I took a moped through rice fields and the lushest greenery. I explored a cave and exfoliated every inch of my body in pool of thick, creamy, mud. I hiked Moon Hill. I drank the most delicious mango smoothies made from the biggest mangos you will ever encounter. I swam in a river than looked like it was straight out of a movie scene. I sat on a balcony with the friends I’ve made here and watched the sun set as I laughed and ate Indian food.

Dr. Seuss says “KID, YOU’LL MOVE MOUTAINS. I think in Yangshuo, the mountains moved me. BUT, I know on good days or bad days, there are still many adventures awaiting. I’m off to Great Places. Today is my day. My mountain is waiting. I’m on my way.

We are all on our way to greatness. So, the blog ends here, pack your bag and go on an adventure. Whether your bags are literal and you travel all the way to Asia, or they are more figurative and your adventure is in the room over sharing memory with a loved one, there is so much waiting for you to make your life great. And don’t forget to stop and look at places you’ve already been. God is so merciful and full of love. He is shaping us and standing by our side through every adventure. “Oh, the Places You’ll Go.”

Yangshuo is my new happy place

When I thought the end of my life was on this sleeper train.

Summer Palace 

Cami's fiance, Dallin

Jenny's cousin, Ellie

My long lost soul sister, Cecilly. Literally living my life.

Garden next to the Forbidden City

HEEYYY, Great Wall.

Scarier in real life. 

All of us with some of the Dr. Seuss mountains

Bamboo rafts!

Our raft rower was the BEST. He was so funny, was splashing us a ton, and encouraged us to splash everyone we passed.

Mango Smoothies on the daily. My favorite one was this Mango Avocado one.

Mud is proven to increase happiness by 78.96%. 100% when it's in a cave. Don't fact check me. 

A little spring to get clean

Cultural difference: everyone else on this river drifting excursion was in full clothes and rain poncho's. We are talking heels and long sleeved shirts. But i mean, I think we all know who was more prepared.

Ignore the cartoon cat on the bottom. I'm cool.

S Q A U D

I thought I got a great price on this flower crown. Turns out I paid just to try it on. Whatever. I can make my own. 

The old city.

Moon Hill

When we were at one with the Universe.

And then I beat up Emri.

But the Universe was still on my side.